IT IS NOT WHAT IT IS


I let my hopes on the shoulders of a bunch of people looking forward to a crash. As a female figure, I have heard a lot of information about the uncertainty of my dreams and the unrealistic points I pay attention to.

It takes nothing but a few drops of water to make the steam of tears from my eyes overflow. Because of something I can’t change, I have to prove my points more than usual, I need to fight so that what I call “dreams” makes a bit of sense to people around me. Just because I am a woman.

 Extra efforts and more convincing speeches to prove that my brain works normal, that my heart beats normal, and that my existence is worth appraisal. That what I fight for should be fought for.

There is a deep cut, a decay in the setup, in the way it is, from the way it is meant to be.
It took me long until now before realizing that it doesn’t have to make sense to you. A lot of things don’t make sense to a lot of people and even when it is completed and finalized, it still doesn’t make sense to a lot. I am writing this with tears in my eyes. Yes, I know that sounds weird but I get hurt by the things I see around me.

Growing up, I used to hear a lot about passion and I must confess, I didn’t know it’ll feel this way.
I have heard a lot growing up- “That is how it is meant to be” – “It is what it is” – but, it took me so long, so long until now to realize that It is NOT what it is. I do not blend. I have never done well with that. I never agree with principles than I do not believe in.

It is the way “other women” have done it for years, they let down their pride and crawl- they have been allowed to sit under the feet of customs but I say to them – I AM NOT EVERY OTHER WOMAN, you do not have to be too.

I have heard a lot – “If you continue like this, you'll regret it” – “You can’t be this career-driven, you are a woman” – “Why are you always fighting against tradition” -- The first day I heard all these, I fumed! What do you think I am? A trophy to be presented? What do you think I should do? Do you expect me to crawl? Is that all you think of me?!

I repeat, DO NOT BE INSENSITIVE

I have lost a lot of “friends”. I put “friends” in quotes, you know what I mean. I used to be hurt initially but I have come to realize that people come and go. A lot of people have said so much about what I do and initially, I used to calm down a bit, but now, I don’t care. I do what I do for me and for millions of people around me.

IT DOESN’T HAVE TO MAKE SENSE TO YOU

Coming into this world, I was given a choice, a choice to live and with that choice, I have the right to explore.
I would not let a single teardrop anymore. I would not stop what I do because I  am who I am and people can either live with it or move on with their lives.

I know that I am called weak even though I fight the most dangerous fight. Fighting from the day I was born because I heard that I have to be apologetic about my existence.
“Your first offense is being a woman”, they said.  However, I have refused, my whole life. I refuse to expose me to condemnation and discrimination. I refuse to put myself at risk of being called a disgrace to womanhood all because I decided to stand up for myself. I am forever a feminist, as long as the sun sets in the west and rises in the east. I am who I am.

I do not necessarily need back up. I back myself up. I am calling out to you all waiting for attention because of disapproval. Disapproval does not invalidate the movement. The movement stands.
If you need a friend, send me a mail. You deserve to roll with people that respect how you feel and who you want to be. Let’s make up our little team.

Setting up plans too tough to be comprehended. Making lists not understandable.
I repeat, if I cry, I am not the reason I cry
If I am hurt, I am not the reason for my pain
I am scared by the rules I met, so I cry instead
It does not mean I am weak, I am human after all
I am scared by the laws in place and the way I am
I am scared that I am told what I am meant to be
But, I bent on breaking the rules!
I am Yommy Ayilara!
Sending love and light!


A WAR AGAINST FEMALE GENITAL MUTILATION!
I took part in an #endFGM conference!
I spoke on the Genesis and Revelation of Female Genital Mutilation.
I am happy that we are on a journey!
We will put an end to FGM in the world!